Good, Better, Best--Choices in the forefront

I know I skipped yesterdays' entry. It was for several reasons. First one, that I figured out while I was feeling sorry for myself. It was about a comment made late in the evening about a coat I was wearing. I felt offended.

I bought the coat, a used one and paid a little more for it being it was "used." I am not one that worries about fashion, but about comfort, and thought the coat had some style to it, yet would keep me warm. But the reality of why I buy things used was evident in my choice. Nevertheless the comment left a hurtful wound I suppose and one that I will just have to work through and "get over it."

The lesson I learned about the coat comment and not writing my daily journal was important. Why should I let the comment take away from how I feel about myself and damped my spirit from what I could have learned by making note otherwise?

The Good, Better, Best choices was not an easy task for the day either. I had to decide which place to be at the same time for sacrament meeting--either attend Vermont 3rd (singles) ward where Kaiwi was called to serve as Bishop. Or be where Aaron was speaking in our ward. He and I were invited to be present for his setting apart. I know I missed out on a great meeting, and cannot compare the feelings that may have transpired in the other sacrament meeting. We went over after our meeting to the stake center.

I just know that as I heard the blessing pour out from the stake president's mouth, the confirmation was clear the call was made by the Lord. The sweetness of the Spirit was choice and with all that was said, I know Bishop Chung-Hoon is going to have a marvelous experience in his home, help with work on his advanced degree, AND as a bishop to the young adults in his charge. Tanise and her family are in store for many magnificent blessings already.

Later, for dinner we went out to Salem, to Tana and Nathan's for dinner. Tracie and her family were there, as well as Tara's, with Aaron, Candice, I, and kids had an appetizing meal with turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy etc. Tana had a large turkey in her freezer and wanted to have us over while Matt and Beth are still here from Washington. The Hallows' made a delicious slushy-type punch that everyone raved about. It added a party mood.

Matt and Beth called in sick, who both had upset stomaches . . . a bug that Cole had last week, and now took it's turn with them. 'Senior' Hank was there also, and we all had a pleasant evening. At least I did until the tacky comment about my coat! Oh well, I cannot please everyone, so why try, right?

I decided to donate the coat to a store that I saw on GMA this morning which showed people giving their warm coats for the less fortunate. Now, how timely was that for me to see that clip? It should make someone else happier with it than I ever would be. God bless them all.

Quench Not the Spirit---Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto thee.

I was unable to sleep last night so I read the Conference issue and picked up where I left off. I read the talk by Elder Keith K. Hilbig. I was impressed with this particular message. He quotes I Thessalonian 5:19 , "Quench not the Spirit." He then quotes from the Book of Mormon in Jacob who wrote 500 years before saying, "will ye reject the words of the prophets; and will ye deny the good word of Christ, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and quench the Holy Spirit?" He warns us, in our day to be careful not to hinder, disregard, or quench the Spirit in our lives."

He gives a checklist in choices that we could make that either brings us closer to God, to take us far from him.

"When we invite the Holy Ghost to fill our minds with light and knowledge, He quickens us, that is to say enlightens the inner man or woman. As a result we notice a measurable difference in our soul. We feel strengthened, filled with peace and joy. We possess spiritual energy and enthusiasm , both of which enhance our natural abilities. We can accomplish more than we otherwise could on our own. We yearn to become a holier person."

I appreciate the reminders to help me become more receptive to the Holy Ghost and follow its counsel and be a better person is my humble prayer.

Hope in the Savior and his great love-- Synonymous with the Atonement

A woman wrote a letter to President Monson and she said, "Sometimes I wonder If I make a difference in my children's lives. Especially as a single mother. . . , I sometimes come home to confusion, but I never give up hope." December Ensign, 2007

I had a conversation with Tanise this week and she mentioned this quote. I would like to tell about my experiences as a single mother. There were many choices that I made that effected each of you and my life as well. The one about remarrying and undoing it was one of those. My education also was a big decision which made such a difference in the lives of my children without a doubt.

This week I had the impression of the assurance that I made the correct, wisest decision that was right for me. I attended the funeral this week for David Michael Perkins. He died suddenly of natural causes in his sleep, at age 40--. He left a wife but had no children. I saw his father there at the mortuary, as you all know as Michael. He had changed so much and appeared to have had a stroke or some kind of dementia, although he did know me and thanked me for coming. His speech was slowed; he didn't have the spark in his old personality that I remembered him. His daughter, Becky told me beforehand that he has not been himself the last several months. He was also about three inches shorter than he used to be. It was confirmed again to me that the choice to go forward alone without a companion was the best I could have done for me and my children, and never looked back.

I never gave up hope--

Somehow, failure was never a consideration or option in working through the challenges. When I had a big decision to make I always went in prayer to the Lord and listened to his guiding words and inspiration. Each of you came with a different set of challenges, as you all know we each have them. I could not use the same solution with each and all because each of you were not all the same!

I was very blessed that way that I learned to know from those promptings of the spirit attending the temple often or receiving priesthood blessings along the way. There was never a problem too small or too large to call upon HIM for his grace and carry me through--

Blessings of the Covenant

One that I count as the greatest blessing I have had was to see each of you married and sealed in holy wedlock by the power of the priesthood ordinances in the temples. Another great blessing of me personally was to be sealed to my parents. I always honored my parents, in life and now beyond the veil. They continue to bless me and our family.

I think that when Grandpa Rodriguez came to live with me we forged a bond of love that transcends into a strong welding link that blesses many generations back as well as forward. I learned that the sealing I received gave me my "birthright." I had never thought of it as that before then, but know by the Spirit it is true.

Each of you have given each of your children that birthright by virtue of your sealing when you were married. I pray that all of my posterity will honor themselves and carry on the blessing of birthright to their own children. Years ago, I taught the sixteen year olds in Sunday school that the parents they should honor most was those of their own children.

Windows of Heaven

Another great opportunity and blessing was to have four missionaries out over a six year period of time. I was in school during those years and it seemed like that was my "mission" to be in school at that time. I know the blessings poured out of the windows of heaven and I cherish the memories of your mission service and how close it brought me to the Lord. I vicariously experienced your missions with all five of your missions. It was a time of refinement and growth for me too. Thank you, all.

So, yes I have seen the hand of God through the lives of my children and now grand children. I feel honored to be your mother, grandmother. My heart and joy is full. God bless you all.

Love always, Mom

Signs of the Times--Prophetic statments through the Priesthood

This morning I read in the news about an incident that struck my memory from when Tana was blessed as an infant. Your Dad, was voice. I remember at the time when he gave the blessing and wrote down some of the things he said. The following is a letter I wrote to Tana this morning and it explains what those statements said.

Power in the Priesthood

Dear Tana,

I just read an article online that reminded me of when you were a baby. The reason I say that is because what I found reminded me of a statement in your baby blessing that was told when you were blessed by your dad as an infant as many years ago as you are old now.

At the time it was given, I jotted down what was said. I don't know if you have that or not right now.

Nevertheless the thoughts came at the time, 34 years ago how the world would be in such turmoil for such things to come to pass with this "prophetic" statement.

The words to the best of my recollection that stood out this morning and then was when you were an adult . .

"there would be blood in the streets with destruction, and wickedness."

These times have arrived and have been for the last several years. I know that things have gradually progressed to the escalation that we see occurring at this time in the Middle East. There are no pat answers either.

I know without a doubt that the peace that we can find is in the Savior. Paraphrasing his words. . . "Peace I leave with you, not as the world giveth, but let not your heart be troubled or afraid."

I love you, God bless you and your family.

Love, Mom


Article excerpts--Martyrdom of a woman from Pakistan by the name of Bhutto--

"The road outside was stained with blood. People screamed for ambulances. Others gave water to the wounded lying in the street.

The clothing of some of the victims was shredded and people put party flags over their bodies."

The scripture comes to mind of the parable of the hen who gathered her chicks.
We live in perilous times as they say. A time that we see very righteous on the one hand and very wicked people on the other.

Doctrine & Covenants 10:65 states:

"For behold, I will gather them as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, if they will not harden their hearts." D & C 29:2,

"...even as many as will hearken unto my voice and humble themselves before me, and call upon me in mighty prayer." . . . How oft would I gather thee together as a hen gathereth her chickens. . . but ye would not (come unto me)?"

HE is calling us one by one, almost pleading for us to gather to be safe and be spared. " D & C 43:25,

Food For Thought

"How oft I have called upon you by the mouth of my servants (listening to Conference) and by the ministering of angels (Grandparents on the other side in our midst) and by mine own voice (scriptures) and by the voice of thunderings and by the voice of lightnings, and by the voice of tempests (disasters) and by the voice of earthquakes and great hailstorms and by the voice of famines and pestilences (calamities) of every kind, and by the great sound of a trump (so many temples erected all over the world), (and missionary work!) and by the voice of judgment (honoring our Bishops), and by the voice of mercy (sustaining the brethren) all the day long and by the voice of glory and honor and the riches (blessings of temple covenants) of eternal life and would have saved you with an everlasting salvation (made choices outside of the covenant), but ye would not." Parenthesis are my own interpretations here.

"Israel, Israel, Oh Israel, God is calling. . ."
I pray we will be counted among those who heed his counsels.

Amen...Love, Mom

Pondering--Thinking on New Year's Resolutions

Already I am looking ahead to a New year. I love to move forward and not look back.

There is something about the newness, the fresh page unblemished that is exciting to me. So getting ready to make some changes is natural this time of year.

I was really thinking this last week about what I could do to improve myself and wanted to get some concrete answers before forging ahead. I like to look before I leap I guess. I was considering a fast fad diet and wanted to be sure if it was right or not.

Still small voice

There are so many voices out there, it can be scary...right? Well I cannot deny the still small voice prompting to do what it is that I need to do. The message I have received is first to take care of ME. Really take care of me. To honor who I am and take the best care of myself and be my own best friend.

Whether that means pulling back, that is good. Or maybe it means forging ahead with gusto. I know I am on the right track. Several months ago (in August)I came across a book I could download that was an in depth study about an alkaline diet. I was researching the alkaline water and wondered if a change in diet would increase the benefit besides just drinking Kangen (pure) water.

I sometimes get a little frustrated with downloading things online. Somehow I don't "get it" very well, I think I do it wrong and it ends up unused or left in a file. That is what happened when I was so gung ho about it at the time and then left it in a file to figure out later.

Well, later arrived yesterday. I had a prompting several days ago, before Christmas to find an alkaline plan to change my dietary habits. Time and space had passed since I remembered I had an alkaline diet file. IT was yet to be downloaded until I was browsing my files yesterday with out any pressure to be anywhere or anyplace. Lo and behold I found that file and it was so EASY to print it out that I was ashamed for not having it at my fingertips sooner.

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear

I suppose that saying, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear" is right. I was ready for it and didn't realize I had the plan already. The best part is that I didn't have to buy it again!

So, I printed it out, all 94 pages. I had already made a resolve to take better care of myself and be mindful of how I was feeling and act on it to keep the homeo statis of my body. I will have time to study it and make a few changes.

Today I already noticed this new resolve take over. Aaron and Candice called me to invite me to have dinner with them at Pizza Factory. They had gone out to run errands, picked up the girls at a friends and were on there way to eat. It was about fifteen minutes, from the time he called that I arrived at the restaurant. One of the things I have done in the past, was drink water while our order was being prepared. I skipped the water, since I learned that drinking 45 minutes before you eat is better for digestion, or drink 45 minutes after eating.

I noticed I was not famished waiting and when our meal came, I felt already full and could only eat a small portion of the meal. I ended up taking over half of it home to eat as leftovers tomorrow. I noticed I was full before I even had a few bites. I didn't have liquid before and was amazed at how satisfied I was with what I did eat. They ordered those cinnamon bread sticks which I used to enjoy too. But I passed on those too this time.

I rested part of the day. It felt great and I was refreshed after I showered earlier today, got dressed and even took a good nap before the time I went eat with Aaron/Candice at the restaurant.

Honoring oneself

I think I am going to like taking good care of ME! I hope to make better choices so I can be a better facilitator and instrument for the Lord; lower my blood pressure and reduce the stress in my life. But at the same time I can still have clients in between my resolve to take better care of myself.

When Grandma was a little girl--recollections

When Grandma was a little girl—what was Christmas was like?

Last year an older sister in my ward gave a talk about what her childhood Christmas’ consisted. It gave me an idea today to write about what I remember about my own. The holiday season was the era when we still had live green pine trees and decorated. Later, when I was a teenager, the aluminum silver Christmas tree was introduced and we had one for years, before silk Christmas trees. Artificial is what they were called then.

My mother had taken a picture of me one year of me holding the decorated tree outside in Texas, in March! Yes, she had kept the tree up that long! It may have been our last Christmas in San Antonio. We left in mid-March when Martha, my sister was six months old. Mom did keep her tree up longer other years too as I recall.

Twas the night before Christmas. . .

Our celebration was about gift giving on a very small scale. Nothing was elaborate. We even had been known to put fake empty wrapped boxes under the tree. I cringe now just thinking about that for some reason. We decorated our tree with those shiny glass colored ornaments of red, blue, green, silver and gold. There was some traditional garland and in those days we put “tinsel” on the tree with a lighted star on top. We had colored strings of lights like the coveted “retro” lights of today. This was long before those ‘mini’ sets of lights came out. We bought tinsel in flat boxes with strings of silver aluminum looking strings of silver. It was supposed to give the effect of icicles I believe. The streams of tinsel were actually made of cellophane, a man made product and covered with silver coating. Then when we would un-decorate the tree, all that would be left on it was the tinsel. It would go out into the trash with only the tinsel hanging on it.

In hopes that St. Nicholas would soon be there!

We did have Christmas stockings, and we usually had that old hard candy that was filled with jelly inside so sugary it could rot your teeth if you didn’t brush them. They also put walnuts, pecans, filberts, and almond-- all in the shells in the red mesh looking Christmas stockings. There also was a fresh orange or tangerine.

This tradition of the nuts, candy and fresh oranges or tangerines must be a tradition from the “Depression” years when things were scarce with not a lot of extras. Oh, I can’t forget the candy canes! We seemed to only have peppermint flavored candy at Christmas time. You always had more peppermint that you could really enjoy. I really didn’t miss peppermint candy during the rest of the year!

I usually received only one gift from my parents as I grew up. It would be a doll, or some kind of toy, or what I really needed. I remember when I was about five, maybe six years old we lived in Chicago. We went to see Santa Claus at a department store like Dillard’s. We got in line to see him and waited just like kids do now. That year I got doll house furniture so, I must have had a doll house to put them in.

Shopping in the “dime” stores was tradition for our family. We didn’t ever shop at the bigger department stores like where Santa Claus was. We could by things cheaper at the “dime” store, like F.W. Woolworth’s, or Kresge’s with Christmas music played in all the stores. I recall when the new song came out, “I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.” It was recorded by a young teenager, by the name of Jimmy Boyd. I saw him sing it on Arthur Godfrey’s show. Kind of like Regis Philbin’s type of show, it was one my mother watched everyday. The year that song came out was early 1950s. So that song was out just barely as I was growing up. I grew up listening to Gene Autry singing, the Christmas song, “Santa Claus is Coming to Town,” and “Frosty, the Snowman” He was a country singer, but I didn’t know that at the time.

I just remembered something about those red mesh Christmas stockings. My Dad was a Mason and Shriner. These two organizations are somehow related. Nevertheless, each Christmas he would take us to a Christmas program put on by the Shriners. They gave each of us children a stocking from Santa and a wrapped gift. I think now that I must have received the doll furniture one of these times as I do not recall every having a doll house in my toy box. I never asked my Dad about this and I guess it doesn't really matter now. It is just a faded memory.

Throughout the years I have attempted to make Christmas a special time for my children. The child in me always felt there was MORE to what it was all about, from the gift giving, sharing, serving those less fortunate and being the less fortunate. I count my many blessings for the abundant life I have enjoyed, and I am not talking about material wealth here.

Personally the time with my family means more than all the tinsel and holly. So when we gather for our annual family reunions, I approach it as if it was Christmas-- the giving part and expect nothing in return. That is what makes it so exciting for me, to give and not worry about the rest. I pray some of my posterity understands and knows in their hearts how much you all mean to me and what I am about in all of this to preserve traditions and memories.

A special thank you to all of you for the lovely gift— of my own digital camera you gave me for Christmas. Feliz Navidad!!

God bless us everyone with the Magic of Christmas Day!!!!!

I LOVE YOU--Mom

Going Retro--

This is a dream I had 12-24-07 between 6:30-7:30 am.

I had the strangest dream this morning as I woke up.

I was in another world it seemed. It was a “tour “ through time… Backwards!

I saw myself in situations that were historic, and was seeing what I thought as antiques, but were brand new as they were produced, made or created.

There is no explanation at this moment, but I will write what I saw and remember just to see what it tells me.

There was a unique power about me in this vision. Yes it was a vision. I saw myself like it was on a video, talking to people I knew, and some I did not know.

Interjected in all this was about the present or even future??

There were business transactions I saw Tana working with people and being very successful, and busy! She had many clients and had interactions with them on the phones. All kinds of phones, cell phones, faxes, emails etc. I saw a huge pool of water with people swimming and vacationing where she was. She knew what she was doing and very adept in managing her work. (I called this morning and told her about it and she said it sounded like what she plans to be doing shortly with her business)

Moving right along--

Then I saw a large building that had many rooms. These rooms were from the past as eras from the 1940s, 1930, 1920s, 1900s and back through the 1800s.

The rooms had collectibles but they looked new, not at all like antiques, but in the original state. The inventions of those times were there—telephones, machinery, sewing machines, clothing, furniture—sofas, tables, chairs, mirrors, dressers. There was a shop that others were in charge of “restoring” the pieces to their original new look state. I saw a manager (who looked familiar)in charge of making sure everything was perfect.

I can hardly write fast enough to take down what I “saw” and make sense. I noticed near the last part of the dream that I looked down at myself and I had no clothes on. I asked some ladies for clothes who were in a kitchen cooking and making meals for all the workers in the building where they all seem to gather like employees who were staff restoring everything I saw in those rooms.

I also remember something about flying over short distances in the dream as I went about talking to each group of people who represented a certain time frame. Like in the ten year spans of years that I observed, going room to room. It sounds to me as I describe this like it was some kind of museum to preserve the past as if the present. People could see me flying about, but no one seemed to think it odd or unusual to for me to do that.

I looked back to see where I was and it seemed to be in South Provo area. Then I somehow was back into current time. I went home and everything seemed normal as usual, AT LEAST FOR ME!

If anyone out there has any input to this scenario, let me know!! Thanks.
Comments welcomed.

Two Sacrament meetings-- one missing K9

This morning I went to Sacrament meeting in Hank's ward at 9:00 am. K2 was singing a duet so I wanted to go and hear him to support my grandson. I arrived on time and found a front row seat! I was the only one sitting there thinking I would "save" the seats for the rest of the Ks. After the opening song, K6 came up after a while and asked me if I wanted to sit with the rest of the family in the back. I said sure and followed her to the cultural hall.

Lori said when I sat down that there was no way she was going to walk all the way up to the front when they got there. We had the sacrament, and right about then a man came up to Hank and Lori in the row where we were and handed them K9. He was in his coat and appeared fine. Lori and Hank were flabbergasted to think they had left one child behind in the car and didn't know it! He must have had a hard time getting his seat belt undone while everyone just left him as they rushed in to church. Lori didn't think it was possible for him to be in the car since it was locked! No one knew what happened of how or why, but he seemed okay and took it all in stride as part of being in the line of ten! K9 did not seem fazed by it all. Thank goodness.

Slice of personal history story:

That reminds me of a story I heard told about myself when I was about two years old. My mother was driving with a friend of hers to pick up my brothers from school. I, being the youngest I did not go to school yet. They had gone downtown for something then drove home. We lived in rural San Antonio. When my mother got to the house, she noticed I was missing so she asked my brothers were I was. Beebe answered that I "fell" out of the car down town. My mother was mortified asking why he hadn't said anything sooner. He replied that he thought she would be mad. She drove back to find me in such a frenzy I am sure-- knowing my mother, she wanted to find me, hoped that I was still there and okay. Well, the neighbor who was with her told me that I was just sitting on the curb on Broadway and College Street. My mother never told me this story. I wonder why.

I only knew about the time I rolled out of the car when she turned around in a dead end street by my grandfather's home at the Alamo Cement plant. I was four years old and remember the tumble I took as I held onto the car door handle as she turned around and was just shaken up a little but unhurt. My sister Marty was in the back seat, wrapped in baby blankets, since she was a newborn. I was in the front seat. I had a brown felt bonnet on tied with a black ribbon bow with a brown cape my mother had made from a recycled coat. The coat protected me when I fell out of the 1938 Studebaker sedan and I only got a few scrapes. My great Aunt gave me a cube of sugar to help calm me. That is all I recall, and we didn't go to any emergency room either. My mother said later she was afraid she may have run me over in the turn. My father was in Chicago at the time until my sister was six months and we later joined him.

I attended my meetings at my ward

I enjoyed the talks given at Hank's ward and my home ward. Hank's ward talks were about keeping Christ in our giving and receiving of gifts. Our ward theme was centered on the Savior and the witnesses of his coming. I heard of miracles and faith in the Lord, Jesus Christ in both meetings. I was also pleased to have had the opportunity to hear on the way to Hank's ward on the radio the end of a conference talk by Neal A Maxwell, given in 1998 October Conference, titled "Hope Through The Atonement of Jesus Christ." He said, "Whatever our particular furrow, we can, in Paul's words,'plow in hope' not looking back, and refusing to let yesterday hold tomorrow hostage." How true.

I appreciate the reminder to not look back in sorrow but look ahead with hope.

Violin recital, diligence to develop talents--Time for leisure

This time of year brings several opportunities to attend recitals for the grandkids. It always does my heart good to see them perform and know they have reached a level of ability to bring others joy in their music. Christmas carols played and performed today, Sydney and Courtney, Tara's girls had their's today.

Their teacher is a real strong example of using her talents and love for music which she instills in her students. Lindsay had a recital last Saturday, but I was unable to go hear her play. She has been taking for a couple of years, as Kaitlyn is in piano and doing well. I know it takes mothers keeping them on track and discipline to have them in music. The K's are blessed to develop their talents as well. It is such a wonderful skill, and blessing to have, almost like speaking a second language. Music can be such a positive influence when learned early, and it helps with math skills too. Music was not where my abilities were to develop--although I love music very much. I have always admired those that have mastered being able to play the piano, violin, guitar or who could sing!!

Today the recital program was an hour long. I especially liked the Ave Maria piece they played. It was song played last night at the nativity so it reminded me of the babe in the manger in the stable. Violins have such a beautiful tone and a beautiful spirit permeated the chapel today. Needless to say, I have really enjoyed the reminders of music of the season. Tomorrow is the Sunday before Christmas, so there is a program planned in Sacrament meeting. I look forward to it to worship in spirit and song.

I again am reminded of my many blessings and am filled beyond words to describe how it feels to have my family close by and enjoy whatever time I can spend with them.

Matt,Beth & boys came over as well as K2,K3, and K4 with friend Shauna to watch the BYU bowl game with Aaron and Matt. I watched the last few minutes of it and am amazed at how BYU had stolen the last several games to victory! The kids all seemed to have a good time with pizza and salad and watched the big screen TV for the game.

Before K2 left he invited me to come to hear him sing in a duet for their Sacrament meeting in the morning. He sings like Hank does and is not embarrassed to sing in church. It is good preparation for a mission, I would say. Time is flying by so quickly and he will be graduated and on a mission before we all know it! Slow down K2!

I did get over to the car wash today to wash my car. I vacuumed it and it is very nice inside. I bought some of those cinnamon scented pine cones yesterday and have a bag of them in the car. I like to have my car clean for Sunday, or any day really. It has been so cold outdoors, that I tend to stay close to home where it is warm and cozy-- we had more snow fall earlier today, but not much sunshine to melt the new snow yet.

Why do I always look forward to spring and it is just barely winter so far???

Night in Bethlehem--True meaning of Chist(mas)

My favorite celebration to commemorate is the Birth of Jesus Christ. This year I did something different for my annual 'Christmas' family party. I have to admit that we have had many get together activities this last year, from our Family Reunion with everyone here topped our summer to our celebration in late October with the Heritage party.

It just felt right to do a special adult party with all the grown children. Matt and Beth came for the holidays and it seemed like a good opportunity to have them be a part of it. I was able to get reservations for 15 people for the Night in Bethlehem held in Provo. It was about the third time I had been. I had gone before with friends but really had the impression to have us go as part of this year's holiday festivity. I did it for a two fold purpose. One, so the adults could see what it was like and take it all in as couples. The other was so that they would want to make it part of their own tradition to take their own children next time.

This activity is something one has to experience for themselves. I am touched by the sweetness and the kindness of the hosts of this activity. It is done voluntarily and everyone dresses up and gives their all to make it a success. I took Aislyn and Ella since Aaron and Candice had another commitment with his work. Hank, Lori, Tara, Russ, Tana, Nathan, Matt, Beth, Cole and Ethan were able to attend.

I especially enjoyed the scene with Mary, Joseph and the Christ child. The players were all dressed in costumes of 2007 years ago, the live animals--sheep added to the realization.

The music, harps included was also key in the portrayal of the angels singing and brought a sweet spirit that touched my heart. I felt like I was watching the real thing. The reverence for this re-enactment uplifted my soul and made me sensitive to the love our Savior has for all of us. I bear my testimony that I know the Savior came into the world the same as we mortals, through an earthly mother, yet he had a Heavenly Father through the condescension of God. And he became the Savior of the world to atone for our sins.

We met at the house afterwards and had a sumptuous meal, with tender juicy turkey baked in a paper bag, potatoes, sweet potatoes, spinach salad, stuffing and gravy, raw veggie tray, appetizers and cranberry, grape with peach juice drink. We enjoyed one another's company and had a great time and exchanged gifts at the end. I really can say I enjoyed myself seeing each of you participate and have a good time together.

Thank you each and all for coming and making it so unique and fun, even if we didn't have dessert after all-- Lori brought two pumpkin pies we didn't eat!! Somehow it didn't matter that we skipped dessert and some took pie home for later.

And tomorrow is a new day--only three days until Christmas.

For Beauty of the Mountains--Favorite Things

For Beauty of the Mountains Gives Me Strength from God-My Favorite Things

This was written on my birthday in 1983. I drove up to the Alpine loop to see the fall colors and listen to afternoon Conference alone. Hank had entered the MTC two weeks prior.

For the beauty of the mountains,

I give thanks for peace and hope.

I gaze upward and see

Clouds gently drifting, ever changing

Their form, constantly in motion--

Never to be the same, but creating

A moving scene as they gracefully float by.

I ponder how God is constant; firm as the mountains—

Unchanging in His love for us.

He is the same yesterday, today and forever.

We experience peace and joy

Knowing HE is true, unchangeable, unlike the clouds,

For He is my anchor, my God.

“Blessed are they who shall seek to bring forth my Zion. . .for they shall have the gift of the Holy Ghost--
And if they endure to the end, they shall be lifted up at the last day, and who shall publish peace, tidings of great joy.
How beautiful upon the mountains shall they be.”
I Nephi 13:37

Some of My Favorite Things

The mountains here in the valley have been a source of peace to me, besides represent a feeling of being protected, being safe. I still remember the landscape view from my living room window with the view of Mount Timpanogos in all seasons. The snow-capped mountain was my favorite after a heavy rain it would snow up there and cover the mountain's peaks. The view from the back side of Timp looked to me like the Swiss Matterhorn or the mountains of Austria in "Sound of Music."

I appreciate the simple things in life. My sight, to see all creation around me. The flowers in spring and summer, a beautiful sunrise or sunset. I also love the children's primary song, My Heavenly Father Loves Me. I am thankful for my hearing to hear beautiful music, or the sounds of my birds or all birds outdoors. I also am grateful to hear my favorite Christmas music this time of year. I have also been blessed with a keen mind. I also pray to be alert and enjoy clarity of mind to use the mental talents I was given in search for knowledge.

My cup runneth over with gratitude and abundance, and my joy is full.

Love, Mom aka Anna

Touching lives for good-- "You see". . a tribute

Notes from my journal today:

There are not too many people I know who have a similar drive, or passion for learning that I enjoy and embrace myself. She always said she wanted to be here for the Millennium but "it didn't come before she died," her niece said. Her mission completed it could be said of her by the Savior welcoming her into his arms, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant." So it was, the passing of Marilyn Ellsworth just this last Saturday, December 15, 2007. She was 80 years old in February this year.

I was able to go to the first hour of her funeral today. I had another commitment that I was only present for a portion of it. Her children spoke very highly of her. One told that Marilyn served several missions. One as a young single sister in Mexico and the other two were centered around Family History as a senior sister.

She did much temple work, several times a week; she cared for her sister's elderly (97 yr old) mother-in-law so she would not have to go into a nursing home and so her sister could have a respite and go away for a week. Marilyn not only took care of her for that week, but stayed on to help much longer until the woman passed away.

Such an example of selfless love; she had a great love for children and had a sweet, loving way with them. It was a lovely tribute from her family like a farewell for having completed her earthly mission. I know she will be missed by them all.

Redeeming our Kindred Dead--

There is a project that I am particularly enthusiastic about and that is the Family Search Indexing program. It can be done online and registered rather easily. This project assists the descendants of those whose records on the U.S. or Canadian census' or death records from the UK. I am currently working on some Irish records from the 1860s to 1880s. I KNOW these people are aware of the contribution made in their behalf. I have done the indexing for many of these records since July now and input just over 10,000 names.

Just this morning I had the TV on the KBYU cable network. "Christmas Around The World" was rebroadcast from an earlier live performance. There were so many Irish dances, with the bagpipes, and authentic costumes. My favorites were the red and green tartan plaid kilts worn by the young men and women on the dance teams. There were Russian dances as well as from other countries represented.

It was interesting because as I was watching these folk dancers perform, I was doing the input for the Irish death records at the same time. It was inspiring and blessed the rest of my day.

Lessons learned, Twelve days of Christmas

Everyday there are choices to make. The choice is ours of following paths that can lead us to eternal life or the way of the world. I made a stand today and was very blessed and was proud of myself for taking it. I was invited to go to a meeting, that had a prosperity plan that promised to make someone a lot of money. There is always a product of course and becomes kin to "missionary" work if you will.

I sat there knowing I would need to make a quick decision that would be honest and straight forward. I heard what the marketer had to say and mentioned he had worked for a company that enabled him to go to exotic places, and lived in Japan for six months and took his children 35 times in six months to Disney world there. That was the clincher for me. Read on.

Later as the meeting came to a close I was invited to stay and hear the spiel about how to fast start a business with this company and invest just $1500. Instead of taking the invitation I graciously asked my host who brought me to take me home. In the meantime I visited with several others who were outside the meeting area and started talking to them about what I do. They were even interested in the eye patch. I had one with me and the husband of lady who took me was all over the concept. He said I was fascinating and he drank in the process of what the eye patch does.

He agreed that he used to be so left brain he would have thought all this strange. Not so now he said. He said he was more open minded and liked what I was saying. He is retired now and has learned a lot in the last year or so about things like the eye patch. He committed to go buy one for himself and his wife and daughter still at home.

The subject came up about the business again. I told the others that I felt my work with the generational healing was really where my efforts would go for all the good that it accomplishes. Te money was really number four on my list. I also felt that what I do for the dead, the genealogy and the family search indexing etc was more valuable to me than going to Disneyland 35 times in six months. Their mouths dropped, but they had to agreed. I thanked them and told them the product was great and I believe in their product, but just would buy it as a customer rather than try to convert the world to their company's mission.

Twelve days of Christmas

On a more spiritual note, I was invited to go see the K's perform at the Seville for their Enrichment night. Lori told me about it and that K2,K3 and Hank were going to participate on the program. There were other people from their stake who came, one played a couple of songs on the harp, a violin and piano solos. Some one else read a story as was Hank supposed to do also. The second the lady got up to read her story, Hank discovered it was the same one he had chosen to read. He looked a little perplexed but seem to have everything under control by the time it was his turn to speak. He went and found access to the internet and printed off his story. It was his poem he wrote about the Olive leaf. The one about Joseph and Mary in Bethlehem. Everyone was touched by it. I was too. Hank told his brief explanation of our family tradition to write a poem every year and a gift that represented the holiday spirit and of Christ.

I hope Hank, that you make a collection of all the poems, not only penned by you, but all the projects we have done with poems so far. I envision them in a book, illustrated by Tara, and the other artists in your own household! Let's not just think or talk about it, but DO IT. It is a worthy project and deserves to be preserved. That is my suggestion anyway. The seed has been planted, now it just needs to be nourished to grow into full fruition. Go for it...

Syd Crockett had a twelve days of Christmas theme that she talked about that related it to the Gospel in the Dark Ages and how it was preserved through the Partridge on a pear tree allegory. Each of the days of Christmas represented a gospel principle so to speak.

I will attempt to list them, but if you want further explanation, Lori has a three page story that Syd gave to the sisters at Enrichment in their own ward. I found it very profound when she read it and loved hearing the symbolism and parable meaning of each day.

1. Partridge in a pear tree---Jesus Christ who died on a tree.
2. Two turtle doves--gifts of Old and New Testaments.
3. French hens--3 fruits of the spirit-Faith, Hope, and Charity
4. Calling Birds--4 gospels singing song of salvation
5. Golden rings--five books of Moses
6. Geese of Laying six days of creation
7. Swans of Swimming--seven gifts of the Spirit
8. Maids a milking--eight beatitudes
9. Ladies dancing--love, joy, peace, long suffering
10. Lords a leaping--10 commandments
11. Pipers piping--11 faithful disciples
12. Drummer drumming--12 points of the Apostolic Creed

Syd said that these were written during the time of the dark ages. The gospel was more or less banned and people could be persecuted, tried and murdered for openly talking about Christ, God or Holy Spirit. So they kept the Word, gospel alive by putting it into symbols so as to never lose its meaning of the good news.

One more blessed evening and feeling the sweetness of the Spirit to fill my soul and bring me joy in knowing my children all walk in truth. God bless us everyone.

Introducing the Eye Patch, "To patch or not to patch--"

The other morning I woke up with a lot of ideas and thoughts going through my brain. I shared some of it with Aaron and Candice and the girls. Parker just listened, smiled and grunted little. I had this amazing epiphany come to me that I thought was really not my own thoughts.

Just to preface this subject I need to give a little background. I mentioned a couple of days ago about the intense training I took back in November. One of the concepts introduced was to patch one of your eyes and see what results you observed. During the class when my eyes were getting tired, I covered my left eye. I seem to be more dominant with that eye and know it sees for both of my eyes a lot of the time. The experiment was for a brief time to give that eye a rest and let the other one take over, like the weak side to become stronger. Follow me so far? Aaron was listening but thought it sounded kind of "crazy." Aislyn heard the explanation and turned to him and said, "Dad, Grandma is not crazy," as I proceeded to explain the eye patch.

Well, this experiment gives the brain an incredible boost. I began telling Aaron, Candice and the girls about it and was very excited at what was coming out of my mouth. I had not even thought of what I was going to say; the words just flowed. The description I gave was-- say you have a dry shriveled up sponge the size of a quarter. That would be the eye patch covering the left eye. Then the right eye is in comparison this beautiful flower that was transformed from that dry sponge into the most beautiful colorful, bright magenta rose...a big one at that! That is how I understood how to explain it to Aaron's LEFT BRAIN, which is the logical side. The right brain is more creative, and insightful. The left is more linear and just sees what is in front of their nose. The right brain sees the BIG picture. That must be why left brainers ask a lot of questions to "get" what the right brainers are already grasping and seeing. No offense here, just an observation.

I also noticed over the last month or so, that I have had more vivid dreams, coupled with intuition and or insight. The dreams I had about my parents, and Grandma McIntire most recently could be the result of my giving my left brain a rest and allowed the right side to take over.

To Patch or Not to Patch--that is the question

If some of you might want a little more information on this, and I would be honored to give an in-service lesson on it. I think the grandkids would run with it and even think it "cool" to walk around at home with a pirate's eye patch. It has a two fold purpose--especially when one patches they can see the other person's side of their story. Giving the logical side of the brain a twenty minute break can't hurt and you would be a believer. Likewise, one can cover the other side as well and take notes on what occurs. It is all good either way.

Let me give you and example: I misplaced something and patched my eye briefly on the way going to church on Sunday. I rode with Aaron & Candice. (You don't patch while driving.) When I came home, I went right to the missing item. It could have been I was thinking too hard and wanted to find it right then. I let my brain rest from the stress and quickly found what I was looking for. I have no other explanation.

It can become a game you if played as a family and practice doing it at the same time, and that way you can all be involved and share the results!! Why not?

I went visiting teaching today. One of our sisters was leaving for the holidays on Wednesday. We saw our other sister on Friday, which was her day off. My companion called me today and was unable to go since she has bronchitis; her doctor told her to stay home. I went by myself and gave the lesson on Charity, the pure love of Christ. I appreciated the quotes by Howard W. Hunter in the lesson, and I had already put almost the same quote on the side note of my blog here when I set it up last week.

Visiting teaching is one of my favorite callings I have ever had. The visits with the sisters and service rendered in that capacity were so valuable to me when I was doing my hospice social work. It was as if I was visiting teaching and got paid for it in my work.

I had one little patient with dementia think I was from "the church". I would read a spiritual thought sometimes to him. One day as I was getting ready to leave, he said I wasn't leaving without giving a prayer and held my hand while I gave it! I never had that happen with any of my patients before. He was so sweet, he was a lonely widower. His nickname was Rod. His last name was Roderick. His nickname was a name that people used to call Grandpa Rodriguez. I had forgotten about that until this patient told me that he was used to being called "Rod" and not by his real first name, "Dee". I felt a kinship to him anyway but his name sealed it!! His name also if translated in Spanish would have been Rodriguez!!

"Book of Mormon stories that my teacher tells to me"

I went to see Tara tonight for Family night time. She was gracious and invited me to eat lasagne with her. She had a lot of projects going on getting ready for Christmas. I had not been over to see their house for a while. It looks very nice and they have done a great job getting it furnished and decorated. I think now after a year, they feel more settled now that the whole house is completely finished. Happy Day!!

Tara shared with me some highlights of her Sunday School class, she teaches the 16 year olds. I really think the teacher always learns more in just the preparation time. She showed me a reference book on the Book of Mormon. It is almost as in depth as Bruce R. McConkie's, Mormon Doctrine. I liked it and think I will add it to my personal library one of these days before we begin studying the Book of Mormon beginning in 2008 for Sunday School. She said the Church needs this kind of commentary for the Old and New Testaments. I believe she is right. So many church scholars contributed to the one she has and it is well worn and used.

I finished reading my Book of Mormon in Sept and have started it over again, and will be pleased to be re-reading it for personal Gospel Doctrine study in January. It is my favorite standard works. My triple that I study is so worn out, I can't read any other. I have newer ones, but I feel very comfortable with it. How weird is that? Weird but in a GOOD way!!! not "crazy" either.

Adieu for now.

Count my many blessings, Salmon is one of them

Today being Sunday, the Sabbath is a day of rest. I realized today how important it is to go to bed no later than midnight on Saturday. I have made it a habit to lay around after breakfast and get ready for Church leisurely by one o'clock. Not so today. I was awake until the wee hours of the morning, 2:00 am! I was scheduled to go to Tithing settlement at 10:50 am., with my home teachers coming at 11:30. No problem. I was ready and down at the ward on time.

But, there were fire trucks, and police cars around the church building and people were coming out as if it was time to go home. Priesthood/Relief Society for the ward that meets at 9:00 am were leaving early. I went in to hang up my coat and someone asked if I was there for church. I said yes, but then explained I was there to see the Bishop for Tithing Settlement. The gentleman from that ward said everyone was evacuating the building because of carbon monoxide poisoning. The fire dept was there checking all the rooms.

Evidently something had gone wrong with the furnace from the night before. It was discovered somehow and everyone was leaving. I checked at the bishop's office before I left and he was gone, as were the ward clerks. I got my coat and started home. I saw the bishop and his counselors standing outside the building talking to the policemen as I drove home. I didn't know if we were having our meetings in two hours. My home teachers came and went, so by then we were ready to head back to church. Since we had heard nothing to the contrary, we decided to just GO!

The announcements indicated there was indeed a problem with the ventilation and checked out satisfactory for our ward to meet as scheduled. Thank goodness. I count it as such a blessing to have been there today and the spirit was strong. I don't know how I would have felt had we stayed home. But, if we knew ahead of time I told Aaron I would go to Cascade II ward in that case. He wasn't as sure about going there. It does not matter now.

I just rescheduled my appointment for next week to do my tithing settlement. I am grateful to have the opportunity to have tithing to pay, and a the blessing tithing has always been for me and my children.

Windows of Heaven, The Blessing of Tithing

I honestly can say we have not gone completely without the necessities of life. We have always had a home to live in, plenty of food and more clothes than we needed. All of us have enjoyed good health with very few set backs in that way. I attribute that to tithing. Back in the years we lived at BYU married student housing, we did not have some of the struggles others had in being able to provide for ourselves.

We also had the means to take care of our needs temporal as well as physical. When Tara was almost three, she had surgery on her kidneys. She was in the hospital during the holidays. I know we were watched over and she came through it valiantly. She sure had a lot happen to her in her young life. Even so, we had no worries of excessive medical bills and were able to have her taken care of locally instead of going up to Salt Lake to Primary Children's hospital.

We had the guidance of the Holy Ghost to aid us in our time of decision. Again, I believe it was through our faithfulness in our tithes. I would do some beauty work at home, cutting hair, and doing perms for people. I always paid tithing on that money as small as it was at times; there always seemed to be enough to buy gas for the car when needed, or have bread and milk in the house to feed our family. I was blessed in my work besides with our overall healthiness. I remember when things were bare in the cupboards I prayed and asked for help. I would then no sooner have someone's haircut to do and I could get enough to get us through those times. I understood too how it is for young marrieds with small babies and survive pay check to paycheck. It made me sensitive to my own children when they were at those stages in their lives.

I am so pleased with all of my children and how they manage to provide for their own families. It does a mother good to know it is an act of faith to pay tithing. It takes faith rather than money to pay tithing. The windows of heaven surely pour out blessings upon us with no room enough to contain all those blessings. I know, I have lived it.

We had Alaskan salmon for dinner tonight. Candice prepared it. Aaron usually does, but today his feet were hurting he could hardly walk. So we took care of making dinner and he watched Parker. I love fish. I used to eat halibut out at restaurants. But I changed to salmon. Not sure why or when, nevertheless my children don't all embrace the joy of salmon. Aaron was no exception. He left on his mission to Oregon. Salmon country no less. He said he went six months out before he decided to at least give it a try. Ever since then he loves it! His mission president's wife prepared it for the outgoing missionaries and he was there for those times when they were leaving to go home. He learned how to make a brown sugar glaze that tastes so yummy. He did make us some of it tonight to go with the tender, juicy salmon.

Aislyn even gave it a try and liked it!! That is pretty good for a six year old. Ella was not as impressed with the taste. She tried it but didn't want another taste.

Back to lesson I learned about going to bed earlier than 2:00 am on Saturday night. I was so tired by the time we finished dinner. No nap today or time to rest either. I helped with the dishes, not wanting to leave a messy kitchen to close the Sabbath.
There was a fireside this evening at the church with Robert J Matthews, former temple president speaking on his feelings about Christ(mas). I know it would have been very uplifting, but when I was as sleepy and tired as I was I chose to honor my tired body and not overdo it.

I also decided to do my journal entry here before it got too late and go to bed earlier tonight. I know it makes a difference in how I can manage the week if I do take care of myself by taking a nap on Sunday, and it gets me ready for the week. My body needs a rest from my labors which is why and how I honor the Sabbath.

Grandma McIntire and her example:

The dishes all done, the house picked up from taking the extra time yesterday somehow makes our Sabbath a little more restful and meaningful... I will interject something here that Grandma McIntire taught me. She never, right, never went to bed at night with any dirty dishes in her sink. Sometimes she would stay up until 1:00 am making sure her kitchen was spotless.

I know she would be pleased with me sharing this about her and how I value her example. She demonstrated hard work and a good work ethic. She was very organized, had things figured out and done systematically. It helped me teach my children what was expected since I had to learn that myself much later than they did. She was my role model.

I know she has blessed many generations and we can call her blessed. Amen.

Faithful servant of the Lord--

I just read in the paper today, that our former BYU 102nd ward Bishop Seymour P. Steed, passed away this week. He was 86 years old. I remember how kind he always was to me and our family. He was our bishop when Tracie was born. He was finishing his doctoral degree in marriage and family, psychology while our bishop. Now that is amazing. God bless him.

House in order, Positive feedback, Missionaries

The day started out with a prophetic comment made by Aaron last night after dinner. He observed how the house needed to be in order and picked up then implied that someone would be coming today to look at the house and interested to buy it. Candice and I looked at him as if he was only saying that to get us all to shape up, and the house too. He was just kidding really. Then after breakfast he announced there was someone coming at 2:30 this afternoon. We thought he was crying wolf and said, "yeah right."

But he was serious when he got a call from someone to see the house, so we divided up the chores and then got to work! Well, sort of...I just had to make my room more presentable. I really had the intent to surprise myself and do that anyway, so it was not a big deal feeling that I could be compliant no matter what. I appreciated the reminder and have the house look good and it feels good too. The girls did their rooms too, so we all got involved and then I disappeared to do errands at the zero hour of 2:30 p.m. Who knows if someone actually came, it doesn't matter now. Nevertheless the house deserved to be in order. I even did some of my "whites" laundry, towels, garments etc.

One bonus in all of this, which I really appreciated was Aaron cleared the other side of the garage so I could park inside. He did that last winter too and it made it nice so I didn't have to scrape off my car when it snowed and froze up the windows.

That reminds me of my other (Utah) son, Hank was so sweet the other night as I said goodbye after K2's concert and rode home with him, Lori and Karoline. When we got to their house he followed me to my car.

Hank came around to the driver's side of the car and told me to just get inside and be warm, while he scraped the windows. I mentally thought before I opened the door, where was the ice scraper? I reached for it and handed it to him. As he did that I started the car and heater; and I was so grateful and said a short prayer of thanks for such a fine son! I cannot remember how long it had been and used to be to have someone care enough about my well being like that to clear off the windows for me. I know Aaron had done that for me last year before I was privileged to park inside the garage and I appreciated it just like I did for Hank to do that same thing. But you all know what I mean. I felt cherished and loved, really. I almost forgot what that felt like. It was such a small gesture but carried a lot of gratitude into my heart. Thank you my sons, all of you for your unselfishness and how you take care of your families, and ME!! I love you.

I talked to Beth today briefly to see how they are all doing. She just got back from Reno to see her grandmother who is in a nursing home and declining fast. She mentioned she was able to see her sister Becky who came in from Atlanta. I also may be picking up Matt, Beth and boys come in on Thursday late at the airport. I love to do that for my family, to be called upon to meet them and drive them home. My Mom and Dad used to do that when I would fly into California, I know the anticipation I had in seeing my parents again and treasure those times even more now.

Positive feedback

As a follow up from yesterday's results about the family generational work--I want to share here. One of my clients called me to tell me something very satisfying. She wanted me to know one of her daughters whose been somewhat estranged from her told her she wanted to come home for Christmas. She was excited to see her two sisters who were coming also from out of state. She herself is from out of state and wanted to be with her family, since this would have been her first Christmas without them otherwise. She said she wanted to be a part of the traditions she had remembered growing up. My client had before told me how this daughter had a hard time forgiving some issues she had held onto and had almost given up that she would ever hear what she did today from this daughter. I too was so pleased to know how the family constellation work had been beneficial and cleared the negative feelings that had prevailed. It was now as if those things never happened. I know this work that I do has value and can help so many people in the process. It made my day to hear positive feedback with this work.

Missionaries give service

Our ward had the annual Christmas dinner/program. We had turkey, mashed potatoes/gravy, stuffing, cranberry sauce, Jello salads and pies. It was very well organized and everyone got the food at one of three tables. That way our food was warm and there was plenty of it!! There was a great spirit present and we all enjoyed ourselves. The entertainment was well planned and I noticed that hardly anyone wanted to leave early. The one in charge of the entertainment is in the Young Men's presidency and new in the ward, Bro Alejandro Gomez. I knew him when I worked at Nature's Sunshine years ago. He is a convert and very gifted. He sings, plays the piano and other instruments, his wife and five children all participated and played the guitar, mandolin, bells, castanets. He also had someone he knew outside the ward come and play the harp for us. It added a very sweet spirit when the harpist played 'Still, Still, Still" and "What Child is This?". They passed out pages of songs bound in red paper and stapled like a book on the side,a gift for each family from theirs and we did a sing-along. He also asked two missionaries to do a musical number. One played the piano while the other sang, "Mary, Did You Know?" I was touched when the missionaries did their number. I watched them and felt I was having a dejavue seeing my own sons do that on their missions. The one that played the piano resembled Michael. And the other one reminded me of the other three, Hank, Aaron and Matt rolled into one missionary!

I felt like they were back in the mission field singing and I was there to see them. Crazy thought, nevertheless I was touched and grateful that my five missionaries,Tana included had mission experience teaching the gospel and sharing the message. The missionary mentioned also that they had a new convert who was baptized this morning and was at their table. The Bishop attended the baptism where the missionary sang that song, and was impressed to invite them to our ward dinner and sing for all of us. It was so sweet and I drank in every bit of the sweetness of the missionary spirit....I even thought of the song "Called to Serve" which I can never get through singing it without breaking down and cry instead of singing it...holy cow!!

Yes, I felt the hand of God touch me today in all areas mentioned. Thank you all for contributing to my joy in so many ways just being who you are and the blessing it is to be your mother, grandmother, mother-in-law and friend. My heart is full. God bless you all. I am so blessed. My patriarchal blessing promised me that my children would be my greatest joy and you are.

Family Tree of LIfe

As I relax at my computer I look up and see on my wall a huge poster of an artist's concept of a tree of life. It represents the branches of many generations of families and the many fruits that represents the individual. I was so drawn to it perhaps because it does represent each and all of us as if it could be like a genealogical family group sheet. The artwork is actually what is called a fractile, and computerized art. It is also sometimes referred to as sacred geometry, or God's natural geometric shapes like a mother-of-pearl, nautilus shell.

Generational healing work

Recently I have been doing some generational clearing for several families. It is very obvious to me that it is no coincidence how I came upon this kind of therapy to help families release their emotional traumas, infirmities, fears, etc and replace with positive attributes. About a month ago I was in some intense training for individual, and group therapy. I learned so much and felt I had made great strides to find out more about my view of the world since early childhood. It was a treasure of knowledge and gave me a foundation for the work I would be doing now. I studied out what is called family constellations and trans-generational healing work. It is a method of therapy that I only knew from the textbook references that came up in my graduate studies. I cannot say that I was schooled in it to be any kind of expert.

I noticed that all of a sudden the light of knowledge was released into my brain and I am running with it, as there is no limit to the possibilities. I learned that I can do this kind of work for as many or more than seven generations of families at the same time. I made a little game of it and used figures on my desk to make it like a game. I talked to them as if they were real people, keeping in mind that they each represented an entire family line with real issues. I knew ahead of time what those issues were and began to get into who these people really were. The results have been amazing, almost incredible and immeasurable.

Comments such as, "my daughter and my husband are communicating on a whole other level without the judgment and tension they used to have only last week." Or, "they were able to see eye to eye and gave each other hugs in all sincerity when they parted after a visit." There were other positive statements made by another family that noticed one of the little boys was no longer having anger issues. I know that the hand of God brought these concepts to my attention at the right place at the right time for me to serve others. I am only the facilitator and cannot take any credit for it. I am not alone and know I have the support needed to get these kinds of results and doing well with in in my work and compensated for it.

On a lighter note, I went to the movies tonight with Aislyn, Ella and Parker while Aaron and Candice went shopping. Yes, Parker went with us. He actually was quite good, he sat on my lap and watched the entire movie without being bored. The movie was "August Rush". It has a lot of music in it and Parker has such good rhythm already that he sat and rocked to the beat of the music. No doubt he has innate gifts we are just seeing at such an early age to nurture them for future abilities.

I am A Child of God--Christmas Spirit- Holiday Season

I am a child of God with a spirit lineage to heavenly parents. That parentage defines our eternal potential. That powerful idea is a potent antidepressant. It can strengthen each of us to make righteous choices and to seek the best that is within us. Establish in the mind of a young person the powerful idea that he or she is a child of Gods and you have given self-respect and motivation to move against the problems of life.
When we understand our relationship to God, we also understand our relationship to one another. All men and women on this earth are the offspring of God, spirit brothers and sisters. What a powerful idea.
Dallin H. Oaks

This quote by Elder Oaks was very profound. I know that once we DO understand we are spirit children of our heavenly Father and spirit brothers and sisters of one another, we feel our own self-worth. WE are all connected! We don't have to know about quantum physics to know how we are all bonded through being literally connected to our Father in heaven and his son, Jesus Christ. He is in all of us.

Today I went to have dinner with the K's prior to going to K2's high school Christmas program. Lori made a delicious chicken vegetable noodle soup. We went over to the school and were entertained for almost two hours. The event was filled with beautiful songs about Jesus Christ, our Savior, the babe in the manger, the Wisemen, and the star in Bethlehem. I was so thankful to hear the school choir sing honor to our Savior and for the freedom we enjoy to hear these songs in a school setting.
I heard the voices all come together for the special number at the end, the Halleleujah Chorus.

This experience reminded of how I like to have a special event of this nature that I attend each year, one that uplifts and has a special message and commemorate the birth of the Savior. Hank and Lori's last ward used to have the "Night in Bethlehem" I loved that and remember the last one I went to was days just before my mother passed away. That little program carried me through that year with a special feeling in my heart to really celebrate Christmas the way it perhaps was intended. All of my children got together that ten days and made me a pieced hand quilted quilt. I was absent and in California with Grandpa Rodriguez.

When I returned just days before Christmas I was grieving and had not shopped for any Christmas presents. I had a photo of my mother when she was sixteen that Grandpa had given me while I was there with him. I decided to give each of the older children a copy of that photo of my mom, Elena. I felt her love for each of them and how much I loved her to share that gift. As I look back that was truly the Spirit of Christmas for me to not be caught up the worry of worldly things. I learned something very valuable. We give gifts as substitutes for our Love instead of giving something with meaning.

Ever since that day I always searched for something that could not be bought (or returned) for that matter. I would thoughtfully decide what it was that I wanted to have as a legacy or memory from me to my children and grandchildren. I let go of the worldly worries and focused on what matters is giving something of myself with true meaning;an abundance of my time and unconditional love. So I learned to give a portion of myself for my posterity as a keepsake or legacy if you will. That is the secret revealed here. So, those pages from "Written on the Pages of My Heart" have great significance worthy of reading. And so goes the "Magic of Christmas" and "God bless us Everyone!"

November Thoughts

More November Thoughts: I wrote some of these entries with the intent to place them on my new blog. So I am catching up with myself the things I would have posted only had not realized how EASY it was to start this blog site. I thank you, Hank for setting the pace and example to do your blog.

Moving ahead and into November, I had the privilege of going to see Matt & Beth in Seattle. They actually live in Redmond which borders Seattle. They have lived there for two and a half years already and I had not taken a trip to see them. I thought it would be opportune to go and use some of my Sky mileage I saved up. Beth picked me up at the airport with the two boys, Cole, two and Ethan, two months. The baby was blessed earlier in the month and I like to be at all of those special occasions. But this time I was able to come later in the month instead and spend some quality time with all of them and I loved it. It was a peaceful, restful experience. It was rainy, a bit chilly, yet like it is a lot for Seattle weather. We stopped after the airport to see Matt at his work. He was in a meeting and came out to greet us. Cole has his mop of hair and Ethan followed suit. I was able to give Matt a haircut as well as Cole. They both looked good with trimmed hair. Matt has remodeled their house and Beth redecorated. Both Matt and Beth are very talented and have updated it that it looks like a new house inside. The bathroom has a new sink and vanity, a mirror and Matt tiled the floor as well as the shower. The kitchen was not exception and they chose granite tile for the counter top, new cabinets and flooring. Matt again installed all of it himself. They painted the walls with beautiful autumn tones and with Beth’s expertise seamstress abilities she’s made curtains and drapes and painted the walls in the each of the kids’ rooms. It was a little bit of heaven. They help the boys learn to know prayer is important morning, evening and at their meals. I noticed their scriptures handy and family night was exercised. I loved being a fly on the wall and part of the weekly church attendance. The ward was great and they all had praise and admiration for the McIntire’s. It felt good to see them doing the things that they were taught when they grew up and teaching their own children the same. Matt and I went to the Seattle temple on Tuesday. I was so pleased Matt happened to take the week of Thanksgiving off, and coincided with my visit and made it fun. We did a little shopping, Beth and I went while Matt tended the little ones and we went to Kohl’s my first day after dinner. We all went on Saturday to the Outlets that were out about twenty miles at a nearby Native American reservation. There is a lot of Native American influence there historically and was told that a casino is there somewhere as well.

I felt like I had seen the hand of God to see both Matt and Beth working together as a couple so beautifully and consistently. It made such a difference in Cole to have either Matt or Beth give him his bath, put him down with stories and talk time before he goes to bed. Something else I noticed was that they would talk about who would chose to put Cole to bed etc, and the other one did the dinner dishes. I was impressed with their diligence how they work together to make things run smoothly. Beth was able to spend time with Ethan’s needs and get him settled then do the dishes while Matt took care of Cole’s needs. I complimented Beth on this when I got home and she told me she learned that from her sister, Becky in Atlanta when she visited her before she had Ethan in September. Cole also was in basic training (potty) while I was there at the onset. Matt being home and available for emergencies worked out well and helped get Cole on his way to becoming a big boy, and was a willing participant. Good job, Cole, Matt and Beth!!

I appreciate the time I spent with Matt and Beth and the opportunity to get to know Cole (and Ethan) a little better. I wore those fluffy socks while I was there to keep my feet warm. Beth told me after I left that Cole saw her wearing socks similar to mine and he remember me and pointed to the socks and said, “Grand-Mom, Grand-Mom.” I also am pleased to keep more in touch with Beth and feel more connected with them being in Washington without family. We talk several times a week and I especially like that.

Turning the hearts. . . with heritage food!

While visiting with them, Beth asked me if we could make tamales together. She was willing to have me teach her and learn that skill. They bought the list of ingredients and we both made them after church and a nap. It went fast with the two of us. We made about four dozen, made a dozen and a half for dinner and had extras for left-overs; then froze the rest uncooked for later. The tamales were tasty, we made beef and used the corn flour, Masa Harina, with soaked husks. Matt also wanted me to teach Beth how to make my Mexican rice. She is a great student, she made some rice a second time and it was delicious. I took some of my Abuelita hot cocoa packets and shared it, Matt loved it. Beth was thrilled to learn a new skill and share it with their friends.

We enjoyed Thanksgiving together too. I taught Beth how to make a ‘turkey in a bag’. The turkey needed by the poundage to be cooked six hours. After five hours Matt checked it to unwrap it and let the turkey brown for the last hour. Well, the turkey was not only very well done, but tender, juicy, and it was falling off the bone! She said she would make it in a bag from then on. Thanks Beth, I take that as a compliment. A little FYI here, my own mother-in-law, Grandma McIntire taught that technique to me about forty five years ago-- what a nice tradition to carry on!

Field of Dreams

Today has been an incredible day of awareness and much discussion with several of you about a dream that I had about your Grandma Betty McIntire recently. She and I were very closely bonded in life. It was a very difficult task for me to move forward without her physically here on earth. I missed her greatly and had her in my mind and thoughts for a very long time. I remember our many visits. I felt like she was imparting her wisdom and wanted me to know all that I needed to teach my children while she was alive. Yet, I felt she continued from the other side of the veil for as long as I was raising my children. Then as time progressed I did not seem to feel she was as close as she was in those immediate ensuing years as the children grew and left home. For example, just last week I had the thought in my mind that very idea. I asked myself, “Did my mother-in-law still watch over me and help me with my children and grandchildren?” I would soon find the answer rather unexpectedly.

I had the most incredible dream where she came to visit and we talked for a very long time. She came to visit ( in my “dream”) as I had some of my children over for a Sunday afternoon. I seemed to be in my own home and saw the grandchildren in the living room sitting and talking to each other. I saw some of their other grandparents at the same time. I noticed that when I saw her come in, she was wearing a lovely dress and had some flowers, a beautiful bouquet of lilies that looked like trumpets along with a square box in her arms. She gave me a hug that I had longed to feel and hear her voice. She began talking and looked at me in the eyes. We stood in the hall and were facing the living room and watched the children through the door. I turned to her and commented how cute one of the grandchildren was who was sitting on Great-Grandpa McIntire’s lap. I felt him walk by and just smile at me and sat on an overstuffed chair with one of the grandchildren talking to him. It was such a sweet symbol, having a great-grandpa right there even if for only a few moments. It felt like the bonds of love transcended from beyond the veil in that room.

Grandma and I continued to talk over what was going on in the living room with the family gathered there. I suddenly realized I was the only one that knew they were both there who could see and hear them. Then it was time for them to leave. I walked out with her to bid her farewell. We walked down the stairs from the house to the front. We then walked around the side of the house [on a corner] and walked onto the sidewalk. She again said she had to go, we said our goodbyes; so I mentally decided I was going to watch her walk away from me and out of curiosity I would see what occurred. She walked about twenty feet past me. I watched her as she faded into nothing, and then she was gone. I recalled in my mind’s eye how the baseball players in “Field of Dreams,” faded into the corn field just like she did. Poof, and she was gone!

The overall message that I gleaned from this entire experience is that yes, Betty and Mack, i.e. Grandma and Grandpa McIntire continue to be in our midst. They are there and we sometimes are oblivious and unaware of their constant presence, much like I know my own parents are in our midst. How could they not be? There influence and love for us is constant. They must act as angels giving us encouragement when down, or to cheer us on when we need it most. It is such a blessing and gift of the spirit for veil to be drawn now and again. What a comfort and joy.

Journal entry for Dec 11, 2007

Today marked the 12th anniversary of my mother's passing. I stayed close to home most of the day and thought of all the unfinished things I had and worked on them. It has been a day of pondering the blessings I enjoy.

About my mother. I guess I really missed an opportunity with her in giving her the needed love and extra support when her mother died. It seems like when my grandmother died, I finished thinking about her and or asking my mother about her feelings in her time of grief. I expect nothing more since that is about all I gave. It comes back to haunt me of those times I could have been more sensitive to her feelings and time of loss. I did however when she was alive call her each year especially on my little brother's birthday. She always found comfort in the things I would teach her about the plan of salvation. She even told my sister-in-law the last time they were together how she looked forward to meeting him when she passed. It was prophetic since she passed away a few weeks after that visit.

I miss my mother--no doubt about it and her wisdom and sense of humor. She had a laugh that some of my children tell me I mimic her. I take it as a compliment. I know when those laughs come they remind me of her too! I sense her nearness, as I also sense my dad's. They are together a lot and I know they are watching over me. I know how much they loved me and it makes me feel even closer at those times. They have come to me in dreams. They talk with me and give me advice and encouragement to have faith and that they are praying for me. I am blessed with the comfort they send and assurance I am on the right path.

One particular instance I was working in the temple and could feel my father close by. I stood at my post and sensed Daddy was walking past back and forth much like the ordinance workers do when they are getting a group to go into a session. There is a lot of back and forth from one room to the chapel. This particular day I felt my father come up to me and brush my right cheek almost as if he gave me a kiss, or caress. I also felt his arms around me on my back as if he was walking with me and had his left arm around me.

Then later I was assigned to work at the veil. I felt something very overwhelming that overpowered my ability to speak and give instruction at the veil for the patrons. It was the kind of experience that both the patron and I could not speak, but only feel this abundance of love, without words. I wondered afterwards what it meant. I felt as if my mind was being read and I got the answer in an instant that both my parents were working in tandem and assisting those on the other side as I was assisting those on this side of the veil. I wanted to hold those most holy of feelings for a longer time and felt I wanted to go into the celestial room as soon as I finished with my veil assignment. My heart was full. I was actually done for the day. I no sooner had that thought that I felt my parents impress upon me to meet them in the Celestial room and visit with me. They were able to be there with me only a few short moments. But their message was clear, "Mija, we pray for you to be happy here." I wept tears of joy. I knew what they meant. I admit that had asked just that week "to be able to go to the other side if that was the only way I would find joy and happiness." Imagine my surprise at their comments. I know that our thoughts and prayers are heard, not only by our Father in Heaven, but those of my loved ones who are close (to us) enough to read my thoughts! I felt chastised. I have not asked that again and won't either!!!!

I went to Relief Society Enrichment this evening with Candice. There was a light dinner of homemade soups, apple pie and a short program. I was touched by the musical number played by three young women, the Raun sisters and another young woman whose name I do not know; they were accompanied by the R.S. Secretary, Lis Eager. They played "Away in the Manger." It was very sweet and I felt the tears flow thinking about the baby Jesus and how I learn about him through the song when I was four years old at the old Methodist Church in Chicago. Amazing how I still recall when I first heard that song in reference to the Christ child. It made a lasting impression on my life. The Relief Society gave each of us sisters a special journal with a lovely cover on each one to record our "seeing the hand of God thoughts" everyday. I wrote six pages and decided to do this blog. It will be easier to print out each entry and put it in my NEW journal!

My testimony--

I bear witness that our Savior lives and he was also the babe in the manger held by his dear mother and Joseph who watched over him as he grew.
I am very blessed to have that knowledge and a testimony of the restored gospel, and know without a doubt that Jesus is the Christ and Son of the living God.
Love, Mom